Let the sex toys do some of that work.
Now, if you’ve ever heard a lecture from me or have taken a workshop from me, then you know I always explain that I’m not a sex toy expert and I willfully love to stay in my lane and stick to what I know for sure; the body parts we have and how to make use of them to the best of our abilities.
But it’s not like I haven’t used sex toys before.
As a queer woman, I purchased my first strap-on in my twenties and my first dildo was a silver, glittery dick that was about 5 inches and curved upward. It was so pretty. AND it worked well too.
However, strap-ons (the harness and the dildo) were the extent of my collection (excluding BDSM gear that I used to go-go dance in), so my knowledge about sex toys has always been a bit limited. Everyone would suggest vibrators and, after trying to use a bullet, I learned that it wasn’t for me because the vibration was just too much for me to handle. In my college years, I learned that the Rabbit was a pretty awesome toy because it got to the clitoris and was doing things that no one’s tongue was even capable of doing.
However, I did not feel the need to purchase one because I was having some amazing orgasms with the people that I was with and as a horny college student, there was a plethora of opportunities to get my fix.
At that time, I also learned about the Magic Wand and all its glorious attachments. Again, I felt that vibration wasn’t something that I needed; I just needed a warm mouth with some great suction and some incredible tongue and finger action.
Now, as I approach the age of 40, and have had the pleasure of working with many toys, I believe there are some toys that you just can’t be without when assisting yourself or someone else with an orgasm. It’s time that you do your due diligence and make investments that will only make you and your lover(s) happy for years to come.
1. The Clit Toy
I recommend that every person who has a clitoris should have a clit toy of some sorts. Whether it’s a vibrator or a suction device or a combination of both, the clit toy is always going to be reliable to get you there every single time with no question (unless the battery runs out!). And everyone who has a clitoris (and is also a sexual person) should want to strive to get to that beautiful explosive orgasm; mostly because they are really good for you and they feel so damn good.
2. The Dick
Almost everyone needs the D. Whether it’s attached by a harness or skin, having a great dick is an asset. It doesn’t matter if you are the one getting enveloped (penetrator) or enveloping (penetrated), having a good D is a must. It has to be able to reach the places that you want it to reach and the pleasure it brings is highlighting the power exchange you’re experiencing. A good dick has the capabilities of migrating to mouth to vagina to anus (or mouth to anus) all in one night (and not in reverse order).
3. The Dick Assist
For my folks who have skin-attached penises, I always recommend dick-assisting accouterments. This comes from the fact that I know people’s hands get tired from giving handjobs and as a person who has experienced arthritic hands, I know what it’s like when you’re in the moment and your hands decide they don’t want to do it anymore. This is where the dick-assist comes in handy. A great masturbation sleeve (one that is not enclosed) is an awesome tool to have in your sexuality arsenal because it allows you to have less pressure on your hands and it also gives a unique feeling for the person receiving the handjob.
Now that I think about it, you would think sex toy-makers would come out with a sex toy that is similar to a clitoral handjob. You know…one that would emulate that record-scratching DJ motion. We needed that, like yesterday!
The last thing you should remember is that toys don’t get tired. That’s the best part. I always teach techniques about how to use our own body parts for stuff, even when we’re tired, but honestly, the tech has come a long way and it’s incredibly reliable, and most of the time, more reliable than our lovers!
If you and your lover have the body parts for all of these things, I highly recommend that you take the time to get the perfect add-ons for your bodies and remind yourself that these will always be the gifts that will keep on giving….orgasms, that is.
Cheers to your sexual success!
Originally posted here