When I was growing up, my mom called it my “kitty kat.” I had to make sure that I took good care of my “kitty kat” and that I had to protect my “kitty kat” from any strangers who tried to come near her. If there was anyone who touched my “kitty kat,” it was to be immediately reported to my mom, no matter who it was. I loved my mom for this because she helped me to cherish my vulva and vagina and taught me that I had to love my “kitty kat” by taking good care of her. Now that I’m older, I realize that it’s even more important for us to cherish our vulvas and vaginas. We are plagued with many more stresses than we had as kids and our bodies constantly go through changes that adversely affect our vaginas and vulvas. At times, our vaginas may become more sensitive. We might be more susceptible to Bacterial Vaginosis (BV) and Yeast Infections because our PH balances may become off. Our vaginas become sensitive to the touch when we’re ovulating or on our period, which helps us ignite our sexual energy. With that said, I think it’s very important for us to cherish our genitals all the time and there are several ways to do this: 1) KNOW her. Make sure you know all the parts of her. She will appreciate it. Be able to look at and point out your inner and outer lips, clitoris, urethral opening, G-spot, perineum, and anus. The more you know about her, the better you will be at exploring her. 2) PERSONIFY her. You can give her a name or just refer to her as she/her. I encourage you to say “my vagina,” “my pussy,” “my va-jay-jay,” “my yoni,” or anything else you want to call it, as long as it’s preceded by “my.” Stay away from names like “it,” “down there,” or anything that keeps you from connecting to your genitals. You want to be one with them because the better you treat her, the better she will be to you! 3) LOOK at her. At least once a week, you should look at your vulva to see what’s happening with her. Is her hair growing too wildly and need grooming? Does she have any idiosyncrasies like pimples, ingrown hairs, or symptoms of infections? Check her out often to make sure she’s taken care of. If she looks good, she feels good, and she will treat you good. 4) CLEAN her. I know this seems obvious, but sometimes it’s not. Although “ho baths” and baby wipes help to clean her, she really needs to have a bath or shower at least once a day. Make sure you get in all the little crevices between the lips and under the clitoral hood on the vulva. Your vagina cleanses herself naturally, so no need for douches (unless there’s an idiosyncrasy that requires it). Women’s clean, natural scents can be erotic and smells trigger memories; so make sure she smells wonderful! 5) STIMULATE her. You can stimulate her in a few ways: 1) purposefully masturbate and/or bring her to orgasm, 2) read or visualize something sexual that wakes her up, 3) Kegel exercises, and/or 4) have someone else touch her and cherish her. Stimulating her helps you to relieve stress and releases pheromones, which allows you to feel good and attract people. 6) DISCIPLINE her. I know this sounds harsh, but your vagina will thank you for disciplining her. Sometimes she likes to be greedy, but remember that overstimulation and acidic environments (too many acidic foods) are bad for her. However, don’t discipline her so much that you become neglectful. She needs to be loved and taken care of to the fullest of your capabilities. 7) PROTECT her. With your vagina, you want to always make sure that you protect her from sexually transmitted diseases/infections, by using condoms, latex gloves and open communication with your lover(s). With your vulva, you always want to make sure you protect her by using latex barriers for oral or vagina-vagina contact and use open communication to the best of your ability. The better you take care of your vagina, the better she will be to you and not cause you any problems. Cherish her and love her and make sure that whoever wants to be near her that they love and cherish her too! Xoxo, marla
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